an aspiring author's journey

So, yeah. the night before last, I participated (or so I thought) in a write-a-thon that took (will take) place in like San Francisco, or somewhere nowhere near where I live. But it's a 5-6 hr sit-down writing session with a ton of people and you just churn out what ya can. No editing...just words.

i'm the first to admit that i'm damned lucky to be getting paid to write. yeah, i'm not selling my novels or stories or anything, but my words are out there (and i'm obsessed with putting words together in a particular way, as i'm sure most writers are..) and people are reading them whether they know i wrote them or not -- and i'm getting money for it. what could be better?

Just a quick re-post of something I put on Facebook earlier::

Do you have any great writing insights or experiences you’d like to share? If so, let me know and I’ll get you in touch with my editor. At Fuel Your Writing (one of the top ten blogs for writers!!), we’re always looking for contributors. Even if it’s just a one shot deal. Help your fellow writers–share your knowledge!! =)

Email Me!!

Thanks =)

(If you do it, you’ll love it — promise!)

* * * * * * *

I haven't been writing since I've been busy packing (or at least attempting to while life gets in the way...)
But, I have been up on my horoscope and other such things, though.
I got a really cool card draw the other day and I've learned my birth chart based on time and place of birth. I've checked all kinds of things -- Chinese Zodiac, the moon affecting our moods, Celtic Zodiac, and then my regular one, which is Taurus.

Which, according to this quiz, I definitely am!

* * *

~~~ You're full of bull.



Organized... Hard-working... Comforting... Patient... Easygoing... Does this sound like you? Based on your answers, you are close to the mold of a Taurus. Although you sometimes go off the beaten path, for the most part, you possess many of the true traits of a Taurus. Tauruses are a certain type of person -- practical, conservative, dependable, honest, hard-working and harmonious. They rarely anger, but when they do, watch out; it's explosive. And don't try and keep them closed in -- Tauruses love the outdoors and nature. They love the good things in life, especially those that are pleasing to the eye. They're prone to overdoing it when it comes to food and alcohol. Famous Tauruses include Jessica Alba, Cher, Carmen Electra, Jerry Seinfeld, Jack Nicholson and Uma Thurman.

How you scored against others

2.97% 'You give Taurus a bad name.'
75.13% 'You're full of bull.'
21.91% 'You're a true Taurus' ~~~

* * *

I've learned what my year will be like because I'm a goat/sheep::

This may not be the favorable year you desire. Coming off the year of the Rat, you may be seeking relief from a difficult year. Don't let up now. The Sheep is artistic in nature, but you may have difficulties finding a way to express your creative passions.

It will take an extra effort to rely on the help of others to make it through these times, but if you keep a steady focus on your goals and display painstaking efforts, you will be pleased to see the fruits of your labor arrive in 2010. Don't fret. You may learn a lot about yourself in the process. You are more versatile, as well as resourceful, than you ever imagined.

* * *

And this is what the rest of September has in store for me::

Your strengths now: your calm and steady nature in a crisis; your instinct for what's enduring; your strong constitution.
Your vulnerabilities now: your tendency to resist change; stubborn thinking.

Mercury is in retrograde in Libra, and this shows you new approaches, especially with projects that are based on the principles of harmony. Mercury aligns with Saturn on the 22nd, so your thinking is concise allowing you to integrate new styles. But there's a constant tension to bust out of tried and true forms, with Uranus in opposition. You can feel liberated to follow the free reign of the imagination.

But the Virgo emphasis keeps bringing you back to the power of artful order. Bottom line: you are ready to go beyond your own creative boundaries, while staying grounded in good habits of discipline. It's the best of both worlds, and you're uniquely positioned to make the most of this cosmic stretch and grow by leaps and bounds!

--Everything that was predicted before tomorrow has come to pass pretty much like was said...and this is looking back after the fact.

* * *

I'm finding it interesting that I know deep down that I'm up for a big change in my life and everything I'm reading is telling me the same thing. Heck, even the psychic I saw in May (which I don't know if I believe in all that--nor if I even believe in what all is in this post, for that matter..) was dead-on about some things that there's no way she could have known. I didn't even know...

* * *

So here's the last part of all this. My one-card draw..
I asked for a card, giving a vague(ish) background, and this is what I received::

For you, Death-- the path you're walking isn't easy, but yes, it is the right one. The path of rebirth is never easy, but it is very, very worth it. Go foward, be renewed and reborn, and find your new self.

This, from miintikwa.livejournal.com

* * *

So, I guess I have a lot ahead of me -- including finishing my book so I can start sending out queries next month. Gulp!!

Anyway, that's my life at the moment... We'll see what's in store come next year. I have a feeling all will be different!!!!

I told myself that during the month of September, I was truly going to work on my WiP every day. I've said this before, but it's never happened. Well, not in a while, at least....
But I've been doing well and my motivation is off the charts so I'm excited to see what I have at the end of the month! This isn't just a monthly challenge, though. This is for all the time!! All year long! I feel confident enough to display this badge on my page! =)

I love smiley days! And I love this week, in particular. I'm lonely and have no company, but at the same time, I'm completely alone and can spend my time writing a ton over the next couple of days!!! We'll see what I come up with...

*sadly, though, i'll have to cremate my original cover and place its remains among the others on "eden's ashes" =(

* * *



So, as I've been slacking, I wasn't even aware until yesterday that I received this award 2 weeks ago!! I'm horrible.
But, as it stands, I guess I'm supposed to list 7 of my favorite things and then guide you to 7 of my favorite blogs. Here goes!!



7 Favorite Things::

* Family Guy. -- Yep. Love it. Adore it. Watch it all the time. It's become my new Seinfeld. Anything that occurs in my life can somehow go back to a Family Guy episode. I don't believe a day goes by where I don't reference it -- sometimes I'm by myself in a public place and start cracking up out of the blue. It's great!!

* the smell of freshly cut grass -- one of the best things ever!
I even bought the perfume Grass from The Gap...still have a teeny, tiny bit left in the 10+ year old bottle. Can't bring myself to use it all -- I just pick it up and smell it sometimes. Even a hellish, humid, summer day can be made better by walking past a neighbor's house while they're mowing their lawn. Mmmmm...

* writing -- lame answer, I know, but I can't leave it out. It's just that good.

* my kid's laugh -- greatest sound in the world. Just can't get enough!!

* music -- which I can't get out of my head at any given time. At the moment, after typing 'just can't get enough,' that's in my head. Not so wonderful, but it'll go away =) Music can get you through anything. Break-ups, happy times, mellow times, down days, etc... It's amazing what it can do for your mood. Phenomenal stuff, that music.

* lazy days -- days where I can just lie around and watch movies or marathons of fave shows. Days where I don't have to get ready unless I have to (which is admittedly almost every day, but I hardly ever get a real lazy day. Usually I'm running around doing a zillion things feeling like I'm getting nothing accomplished.) I'm sick right now, so maybe today will be a great, lazy, movie day. We'll see...

* my dogs -- they're the best. They're rock stars!! Nothing about them to not adore. I'm not sure what I'd do without them. How did I live before they were around? My fun, rambunctious girl and my sweet, lazy boy -- they have the best, distinct personalities ever. So great!!



All right, that's 7 favorite things. Now for 7 Favorite Blogs::

* I'm in love with the dark and beautiful The Wednesday Chronicles. Two writers who share a blog about all the things that don't belong anywhere else. It's awesome!

* What a Load a Scrap is my mom's blog that she shares with a friend of hers. May not appeal to many who read this, as it's a quilting blog, but I love it. I've just moved away from her again and it's nice to keep up on what she's doing. Whether you like (or even know anything about) quilts is of no consequence. It's pretty and interesting, anyway.

* A site I love to go to for either the great guest blogs, advice or original writing posted is Musings and Mullings. A great site with a talented author who is always around for feedback on others' work and blogs. Just a good site all-around!!

* Although Marnie Elizabeth hasn't been around for a month or so, her blog, Wisdom to Watch out For never fails to deliver (when she posts ;)). Go check it out and see all the interesting stuff she's written about. Awesome stuff! ...I hope she's all right--I've been wondering about her...

* Penny Lane's blog is just full of all sorts of fun. She's a writer but doesn't really write about writing. Just her life and all the crazy stuff that happens in her life or things she loves or just whatever. It's a good one to look at if you're a little down -- it'll cheer you right up!! =)

* I know I participate on this blog, so it's sort of cheating, but I'm not the creator and I only post once a week. All the girls at if you give a girl a pen... are spectacular and have wonderful insights and info to share. And sometimes it's just pure fun. A really great site that is gaining more and more members. We're soon going to have one of my favorite editors guest blog, along with published authors. Heck, we've already had published (or soon-to-be published) authors on the site. It's Sarah Jensen's baby and she's gathered a great group of women to bring the blog to new heights. I'm honored to be a part of it!!

* I don't believe it's cheating to nominate my nominator, as her blog truly is fabulous!! Emily J. Griffin's a heart on a wire touches on all aspects of writing and is just good, clean fun! Lots of info and interesting things combined makes it completely worthy of this award twice now. Love it!!


So, I guess that's it. These things take so long -- lots of thought required and it's too early to continue. Ran out of steam at just the right time. Going back to sleep now =)
Thanks, Emily!! I'm so excited about my first award =D

I'm spending a lot of time on there again. Hoping to rise in the ranks. Another writer on there, Melanie, explained her reasoning for wanting to reach the editor's desk (it had always seemed pointless to me) and now I might go for it.
My book is written in my head, but I only have 30k on paper. So I guess the plan now is to spend a bunch of time reading others' work and receiving feedback from them in hopes of earning a review from HarperCollins.
We'll see if it happens...
But if I can get confidence from that, then I'll jot down the rest of my book in a couple weeks time. Then I'll edit/revise.
Interesting how my plan keeps changing.....
As long as I reach my final goal of having it readyready for submission by the holidays, I'll be fine.

Yeah, this was a pointless post, but it makes me feel like I'm accomplishing something...it's been so dang long.

Later!!
xx

from 1500 views between my two sites.

i would be blonde and young and not have to give a rat's ass what people think of me.
to an extent, i'm many of those things (except i'm a dark brunette), but i'd love to be what i am and even more.
i'd have sick hair like this girl's, and i'd remember not to start with a stupid tattoo at age 18 that i'll hate in the years to come. i'm getting it fixed to fit in with the rest of them, but in another life, i wouldn't have to do that.

i would have known i was truly a writer at a much younger age. i'd be working on my first book at the age this girl is...not years later like i am now.
if only i were buddhist and i believed in reincarnation. but i'd probably come back as a butterfly or something else that only lives for like two weeks.

i'd go for the 10k/day goal and i'd hit my goal every day. heck, i'd have a novel finished in a few weeks. i would so love to do that right now, but i'm beyond swamped with moving and taking care of other things that i just can't do it. my self-imposed deadline i set when starting this book might not be made because of all the nonsense that's occurred over the past few months. as i said, in another life...
heck, now i have ashlee simpson in my head.

i know who i am and i'm proud of it, but i learned too late, as most people do. at age thirty, i wish i could be like this girl, whereas in ten/fifteen years, she will *most likely* be embarrassed by such pictures of herself. of course i don't know this to be true. maybe she's one of the lucky ones.
at least i'm not so old that i can't be more open and free. i've actually gotten better about it over the past five years or so, which i suppose is quite normal. even in the past few days, i've grown to realize that i don't care what people think. except my immediate family. my chosen family. the ones i live with. my love wouldn't exactly be happy with me being a streaked blonde with a lip ring (he dislikes the scar i have from my labret stud from 6-7 yrs ago), but i'm a bit more unconventional than i had once believed. and i adore it.

so yes, this would be me. heck, it could be me if i bleached my hair and then dyed it. but i don't think i'd fare well as a blonde. i don't have the coloring for it.
it's 1 am and i'm rambling. i cannot sleep for the life of me, so i'm blogging instead. now i'm going to quit and work on that 10k/day goal. i'm not aiming quite that high, but we'll see where i end up. i know i can do 1200/hr, so maybe i can write a chapter before i crash.

nite, all
xxx -e*

I've not the chance to really write any of my stories or my novel as of late, since I'm preparing the house for the U-Haul that will arrive in a few weeks...
So I've been spending most of my time reading and watching movies. Along with taking care of a sick child. That's never fun..

Anyway, as I've been taking things off the walls and putting books in boxes, I'm dreaming of how I will set up our new place. After my post the other day on my writing spaces, I can't stop thinking of how I will create my new space.
On top of that, I've been going crazy making icons and drawing tattoos and other such nonsense... But it's fun. It's distracting. It's....procrastination. And it's me.



Everything in my life is creative. I cannot do anything the 'normal' way (whatever that may mean..). I dream until the last possible second and then I do what I must, whether it be packing, or dishes, or laundry, or anything else that's just not as much fun as what I can do within the never-ending limits of my mind...

I am thankful that my next task today is to write a blog post for giveagirlapen.com. I will be far too busy tomorrow, and it needs to post rather early Friday morning. So I shall write it today and schedule the posting. I have so much fun writing with the girls, so it's not exactly a chore. The past two weeks, I gave advice, but now I'm back to regular posts. Having an idea (sort of) in mind already, I'm excited to see what I come up with.

I hope that all of you use your creativity every day as well, and do not succumb to the boring confines of 'regular' everyday life...

So I have an actual writing desk where I prop a pillow behind my back, pull out a drawer and put another pillow on that and then I lean back and put my legs up on the drawer. A blanket goes on my lap and my keyboard on that.
Once I get settled, I'm 1) comfortable, and 2) at the perfect angle to see my insanely outdated monitor (the computer's great, but I don't feel like shelling out for a monitor when mine works perfectly fine). It was a great setup and I even have a nice view behind me.
Some of my favourite books! Plus a TV for background noise. I love putting in old '80's movies and just typing away. I've seen the films so many dang times that I don't pay any attention. But it is nice to have the noise.
Well, I connected the internet to this desktop and it is just all sorts of slow now. Seriously Ridiculous. Thankfully, I received an HP Mini for my birthday. It's just too much fun. I do still like using this computer, and I print and edit on it, but I love having everything so compact.
Have you ever used a netbook?
If not, you should! Fabulous.
Needless to say, I spend most of my time on my mini and, of course, the internet is insanely faster on the tiny, new computer that has next to nothing on the hard drive as I use all external devices for storage.
So, now I spend most of my time in the living room. I can get as comfy as can be with my loveseat and ottomans. I have a sofa table (not in the picture) that's full of books and papers. As is the end table. Heck, the end table got so cluttered that I had to bring a tray table over next to it. Yep. Just shoved the sofa on down a little bit and made room for more writing junk. ;)
After the move--once I'm all settled--I'll post my new space...
I'm rather interested to see what I'll come up with.

i'm not sure why i started this particular blog.
i truly love it---it's quite different than my other one.
it doesn't receive as many views, but so fracking what...

it's hard to come up with stuff to say on two separate blogs, plus comment on followers of both and find other random blog posts i like. oh, and it's always nice to find time to work on a WiP every day. and of course, spend time with my family and make sure my house isn't a disaster by the time my guy gets home from work.

but somehow i do it. (probably because my brain never shuts up!) but not always well, especially over this past weekend. so i just wanted to come give this blog a little love and report that i think i'm going to hit my goal of 2,500 words today! it took just under an hour to get halfway there.the problem now is that i took a break because i was proud for writing so much and an hour later, i haven't gone back to my doc.
guess i'll finish this up and go there...

2,500 may not be a lot, but i'm not on a publisher's deadline or anything... if i was getting paid for this, i wouldn't be spending my time watching 'judge alex' and wandering around the house & the internet.
heck, last week i was only writing 250wrds/day. it sucked.
so i'm grateful that my kid is with my mom right now. she's having fun playing outside and spending time with nana, and i'm actually able to write. a rather decent amount, i believe...
so i'm off to do that.

So, my child likes to color. What 4yr old doesn't? Well this one likes to color on walls. As I'm sure other 4yr olds do.
Hence, this blog post.

Last night, my boyfriend/sorta-husband/mate/whateveryouwannacallhim came in while said child was cleaning the brightly colored wall and in his hand was a bottle of something from the garage. I could smell it from fifteen feet away. Hesitantly, I *allowed* him to test it out on the wall. Oh. My. God! It worked like a frackin' miracle.
Now, the baking soda and ammonia mix I'd made worked really well also, but it doesn't even compare to this magical mechanic's elixir.

Liquid Wrench's Silicone Spray.
Masterful.

If you ever need to get anything off of your walls, be it crayon, dirt, food, whatever (I know because I proceeded to clean elsewhere with it), this is the stuff you should use. Without a doubt. Phenomenal. Did I already say masterful? Well, I'm saying it again. Try it. You won't believe it.

Maybe I'm coming across this discovery late, but for some reason I doubt most mom's bring in the silicone spray their mechanic-ish man uses in the garage on engine parts and such. I know I like to keep what belongs in the garage out there.

Anyway, no reason to make this post super long, but I do want to get across to you how superb this product is.

The only caveat---open every single window and door in your entire house. This stuff stinks to high heaven and will get you high, I'm sure. Or, if that's your thing, well then, keep the doors shut. Depends on how many brain cells you need to function in your daily life. I'd like to keep the ones that I have....

Buy some of this stuff. And use it. Seriously.
If a rockstar could morph into liquid form, this is what s/he would be.

At giveagirlapen.com, I recently posted about the importance of the first five pages of one's book. It turned into a few more posts about the first five sentences. Because, let's face it, if a reader (agent, namely) cannot get past the opening, there's not much chance s/he will read any further.

After all of these posts and critical feedback from other writers, I have come up with two sets of my first five sentences.
One set is the beginning of my prologue.
The other is the beginning of Chapter One, which occurs twenty years later...and the book continues from that point.

Here they are::
- I added a few more sentences to include the full two beginning paragraphs of each.
It's my blog. I'm allowed ;)

* * * * * * *

Prologue First Five(ish)::

Ankou enjoyed delaying pleasure--stretching out the game until he couldn’t stand it any longer. Killing a faery was a rare occasion and so when the opportunity presented itself, he made sure to savor it.

The blonde lovely had given birth to a darling girl. Her unexpected pain satisfied Ankou immensely. He had thought the mother would be stronger--it was odd to encounter any weak fae, but it was to Ankou’s benefit she fell in the minority that morning. Such suffering gratified him. Next to consuming an entire soul, fear and pain came second best. He was incensed, though, that she recovered so quickly.

* * * * * * *

Chapter One First Five(ish)::

Sitting straight up in bed, Alexis looked all around her. Patting the sheets to feel they were real, she pulled them close to herself and attempted to gather her bearings.

A second ago, she was deep in the forest with beautiful creatures. She’d smelled fresh air and bathed in the sun’s rays that filtered through the trees. Some of the beings were winged and flew above her head as she watched in awe. Others were like penguins in that they couldn’t fly, but that didn’t take away from their magic. Alexis found them all to be wonderful. Not a single one was as boring and simple as the pale, yellow walls and dark, matching furniture that Mrs. Hodge had chosen for her daughter’s bedroom.


* * * * * * * * * * * * *


So there you have it :D

Not sure if I've posted my blurb on this blog or not, but even if I have, here it is again. This is the super condensed version::

**Intense visions transport twenty-year-old Alexis to the unseen world of faeries. She soon discovers she was born into this world, and it’s where she truly belongs--it is Avalon.
Two friends guide her home after a nightmare reveals that one of her kind is attacking mortals. History has never seen such evil, and Alexis alone must stop it.
The unexpected help of a Depraved faery makes this quest easier. But, when Alexis becomes attached to him and starts seeing the world differently, will she have the strength to choose the right path? Or, will she succumb to her innermost demons at the expense of innocence?


* * * * * * * * * * * * *

i just won me a contest!!
yep.. sure did =)

gotta love it.

* * *

i've decided i rather like having two blogs. i don't have to be quite so serious on this one. the other one's all about my platform---promotion, publishing, editing, writing, blahblahblah.

i do enjoy both, though.
and, of course, my group one.

i'm off to comment and write. i'm done posting for the day as this is lucky #6..
ew---i hate that number..

xx

i've posted three blogs on wordpress today and one on giveagirlapen.com, but i haven't touched this site. so i suppose i'll pick an excerpt and post it.

along with my new book cover that bradley wind designed for me.




Alexis pretended nothing was wrong; like she had glanced behind her simply to see who was around. Turning back toward the pond, she took an invigorating breath, and pulled her knees to her chest. If she looked down and focused on her feet, maybe he wouldn’t sense her fear. At least, that’s what she hoped. She examined the smudge her flip-flops had made when she slipped them on with wet polish on her toes. Then, she ran her index finger over the smooth skin where her simple star tattoo was—near the little toe on her right foot.

Silently, Alexis was willing this guy to go away, but instead, she spoke.

“So where is everyone? Are we alone out here?”

“Yep. We’re alone. They all went in to watch home movies from the football games. Stuff’s pretty funny, actually.”

“Huh, well I was just about to get up and go watch a movie with some people. Are you gonna join us, or....” She really didn’t feel like inviting him, so she trailed off. He would get the hint.

“Nah, I’m just gonna stay out here for a bit and enjoy the view. Just like you’ve been doing.” Something in his tone implied he knew darned well that wasn’t all she’d been doing. She didn’t care, though. That was her cue to get away and figure it all out.

So, I just did a Google search of myself and my book to see what popped up as part of my platform/brand research for my blog post on Friday. (I post one day a week on giveagirlapen.com.)

Interestingly, I came upon this sentence::
"Eden Tyler's family knew she'd be accepted in Hogwarts, the entire family had graduated from the school."
Colour me intrigued, as I wasn't aware that I was attending Hogwarts. I might have the chance to meet Harry. Too bad Cedric's dead---I'm still so hoping to get RP's phone number ;) lol

Apparently this site, missbimbo.com, has a 'Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry Contest'
Some sort of role-playing thing.

Along with it being interesting to come across, I want to make it clear that the Eden Tyler on that site is not me.
Nor am I the male director at edentyler.com who lives in NYC.
(I wish I was, only for the fact that he got to use the url and I had to add 'writer' to mine. But that's ok because it's sort of rhyme-y and hey, it tells what I am...)

OK, I'm off to write.
I'm finishing this chapter and then posting it on edentylerwriter.com

Later!
xxx

i posted a new page on my other blog, but i thought i'd make it more readily available. i used it for a writing prompt exercise.
it's supposed to be how your character felt the first time someone held his/her hand.

here it is::


*************


“You really have that much confidence in me?” Alexis asked, as she reached her hand across the small diner table to touch Sloane. She didn’t even care what the answer was. Still fascinated that he was the first fae she’d encountered with skin exactly like her own, all she wanted to do was stare at him forever.

He gave her an answer, anyway. “You should know I do. You should know everything I’m thinking, Kellyn.”

Alexis couldn’t bring herself to look away from their hands. She was afraid of the look she might—or worse, might not—see in his crisp, blue eyes.

Sloane slowly turned his palm up and laced his fingers through Alexis’ from underneath. The electricity they both felt was undeniable. Alexis had waited years to feel this with Blake, and now she knew why it had never happened.

“I think I do. Yeah.” With a deep breath, she drew on her strength and looked at Sloane‘s eyes, and found herself lost in them.

By Eden on 06.12.09 5:31 pm | (at giveagirlapen)

so i get a lot of views/comments on my other blog, but for some dang reason, the one post i spent the most time on last week (just because of what i had to do---not that i worked super hard on it or anything..) is about the only one no one commented on.

so, i'm gonna post it here and see if i get a different response.
if not, i might cry.
j/k. i don't cry

*************




so, i found this on penny lane's blog.
i wasn't tagged to do it, but since i'm doing awesome with my writing at the moment, i don't want to jinx it by writing any of avalon or anything else on here..

these are the instructions::
"with as much creativity as you can muster, show your heart in:
a picture, a poem, a song (or piece of music), a phrase (or quote), an item of clothing, a place, and (just for fun) a Disney princess."

let's see what i can come up with...


picture::



this picture is from along came polly.
i instantly thought of her when i saw penny's pic from almost famous.
polly can never find her keys. i tried to find a picture from that scene where she finds them in the freezer with the key-finder thingy, but to no avail.
anyway, she's lived in her half-unpacked apartment for months now and is just as scatter-brained as can be.
but she's also sweet and loveable and lives her life with passion.
she's brutally honest and doesn't makes excuses for anything.
every time i watch this movie, i swear i'm watching myself -- except for the whole commitment thing. i have no problem whatsoever with commitment. i adore being in a serious relationship. i've hardly ever been single my entire life.
but yeah, this picture---this character---is a perfect depiction of me.
style and all...



poem::

Pretty

i was going to choose a different poem, but it was entirely too personal to put online.
while looking through the same book of poetry, i came across this one, which has always resonated with me. everything jewel (kilcher) writes seems to touch me. i've loved her dearly for years and years.
this poem in particular just shows how i (and probably every other female in existence) feels. no matter how good i am at something, or how 'pretty' i think i might be a certain day, i still don't feel 'up to par.'
there are many different reasons for this. some external, but mostly internal...something i definitely need to work on!!



song::

so, i just chose a short portion of a song.
it's actually rather lame as far as the writing goes, but it's sooo me it's ridiculous.
here it is:

see, told ya. lame. (it's ashlee simpson.) but it's beyond true.
i swear i'll be late to my own funeral.
eden time is whatever time it is plus ten to fifteen minutes, minimum..
and yeah---i have curly hair, but tend to straighten it.
doesn't matter cause i usually end up pulling it back; it just always gets ridiculously annoying.
my guy likes it curly, so it's even more fun pulled back like that :P
i actually have rather nice hair --- thick and full, so it's never 'technically' messy, but it always feels a mess to me. i can't stand it.
but, at the same time, it's me. so i love it. yeah, idk.... ;)


phrase::



i don't believe einstein needs any explanation....










an item of clothing::



my man's dc hoodie.
most comfortable fracking thing in the entire world.
we both wear it constantly.
i love that it smells like him & he loves that it smells like me.
it's the best!!!
it makes me happy and it totally defines both my clothing style and my relationship. and the fact that comfort is more important to me than most other things.
if i'm comfortable, i'm content with who i am and what i'm doing at the moment. that's why i'm wearing it right now. i'm writing and wearing this---what could be better?!?!?? =)





love 'em! beyond comfortable.
and brown&&pink is one of the best color combinations in existence.
i'm rather big into color...



a place::



i would be ridiculously happy if i could live in green gables with anne and matthew---except he'd still be alive.
the place is gorgeous!!
it'd be extremely conducive to writing and other such things i enjoy...
yeah...that'd be nice.....
i adore being alone, yet having the choice of enjoying the company of those i love whenever i want. and in this day and age, i could be isolated there with fabulous people, but still interact with others through the internet&&phone.
what could be more perfect? ...at least for me.


a Disney princess::

i'm sorry, but i can't pick a princess.
i can pick a Disney character who is a girl, though.
i'm trying, but i can't find myself identifying with any of the princesses...
so, i have to choose:



i'm not totally in love with Disney's version of tink, although i do love her movie. it's quite fabulous!!!
i adore brian froud's version of tink.
i'm pretty sure i have a picture...



yes, this is the tinkerbell i would love to be.
if i could be anything in the world, it would be a faery.
i'm crazy obsessed with the entire fae realm and everything to do with faeries. loveitloveitloveit!!

---well, i suppose that's the end.
the original post was titled 'my heart' per the directions...

you better have read it.
i know where you live!! ;)
(joke. i've no clue where ya'll live)

xx -e*

so i figure if i'm gonna do this blog, i should give it as much time and energy as my other two...

I just set this page up and I have some work to do on my Wordpress blog, but I'll be back later today (as it's already past 1am -- dang!) to write a real post.